On the campaign trail

As Barack Obama addressed the nation after the announcement came that he would assume the position as the next President of the United States, I could not help but bear in mind the gauntlet which Obama eventually overcame. Due to the inconceivable incompetence of the Republican campaign, Obama was able to make history.

With the country’s fat asses in couches, eating Doritos and watching Celebrity Wrestling, the rest of the country was embracing the onslaught of slander from both sides like hungry pigs to a trough.

Hopefully the open-minded combed through the blatant lies to come together with an intelligent consensus, and to vote for the better candidate.

I am still pondering whether Obama won this election or if the Republican Brain Trust, headed by the sinister Karl Rove who has as cold a heart as Norman Bates does towards his cheap Motel occupants, finally collapsed.

The collapse is due in part to the last eight grueling years of President Bush and the list of GOP candidates that see to spell out the sign of the apocalypse. Mike Huckabee is a clear sign that this campaign season was getting strange.

My interest towards this election brought me to discover, at great lengths, the policies each candidate seemed to encompass.

But instead, all I was given was Huckabee’s main supporter, the ex-Texas Ranger and round house kick extraordinaire, Chuck Norris. Huckabee became lovesick over Norris.

At this point I almost want to question the existence of life and I even consider immigrating to China to see where all our jobs have relocated.

Like a pack of hungry sharks hinting at the scent of blood, we were thrown useless story after useless story, and we took to it ferociously.

Most of these illusory stories involved bogus claims of terrorist interaction between Obama and William Ayers, and the ignorance of many Right wingers to think that Obama was a Muslim extremist.

I could only imagine the reaction of the right-wing nut-jobs, as the news announced Obama the winner.

Their worst fear just occurred, and now they head to their fallout shelters to wait out Obama’s first term to be over.

The GOP came to an agreement and backed John McCain. I respect John McCain and his heroic war record, but the Republican candidate questioned my intelligence when we were blessed with the ever growing saga of the 1984 Miss Alaska runner-up and former Alaskan Governor, Sarah Palin.

Her credibility as a legitimate politician brought a wave of negative smear campaigns from the left that resulted in the country fixated on the most terrible symbol for women’s suffrage in U.S. history.

I took Sarah Palin as a simple- minded, over-enthusiastic Christian, who was supposed to infatuate the Feminists of the Hillary Clinton camp to vote republican. Even so, she brought hardcore republicans out of the woodwork to infuse hate and racism at each rally.

There were gnashing your teeth slurs like “Kill Him” and the infamous misrepresentation of Obama’s religion when that poor old woman, who seemed to accidently walk into the town meeting, grabbed a microphone and terrified everyone into thinking Obama was a Muslim, and who cares if he was a Muslim. It is a shame, the ignorance of the people.

It ended on Nov. 4, 2008. We made history. We have hope again. We have a new image. That image is one in which the Republicans could not have legitimately or morally represented throughout the world.

We now have two years of breathing room until we are once again spoon fed the relentless bullshit that government brings to the people of this great nation.

An old African proverb says “when lions receive historians, only then will they become heroes”.

It brings me hope to think of how far we have come as a nation to elect a African-American man into the most powerful office in the world after years of slavery and the civil rights movement.

A new history can be written. Hopefully dignity and honor can be restored to this government, and slander from both entities will cease to exist.