Brian Markley
Sports Editor

Halloween sucks: that’s right, I said it.

There are a myriad of ways in which Halloween is hands down the single worst “holiday” that occurs every year. I use the quotes around the word holiday, given that is a sorry excuse for one.

A little background on my hatred for Halloween. As a child, I was scared when I unexpectedly was spooked from behind as I was leaving a tent that was handing out candy. Sure, I probably should have entered at my own risk, however, scaring a little, unexpecting child is sickening. Fortunately, the parent of another terrified little soul reported the tent and the people responsible, and they were shut down for the rest of the night.

Since that night, I refused to participate in Halloween. There is nothing appealing about it to me, a now 23-year-old man. The whole “Spooky Season” is a sham to me. Sure, free candy is a nice incentive for kids. Nowadays, I can buy myself a variety pack of Hershey candy any day of the week, any season.

Another big aspect of Halloween is the costume. Now, my gripe with the costumes is a much more personal gripe. As an introvert, going out just as myself without a costume makes me self-conscious enough. The last thing I would want to do is give another reason for the general public to look at me weirdly.

I am also a believer that one should grow out of Halloween. There is an excitement that young children have for trick-or-treating, and my goal with this article is not to take that away from them. That being said, I think one just outgrows Halloween. Sure, it is yet another excuse to throw a party and that’s fine and dandy.

My main gripe is that Halloween is treated like a top tier holiday when inherently, it is one of the worst. It is dark and scary, yet the biggest appeal to Halloween is for little kids to get free candy from strangers. Considering we are still in a pandemic, it is bizarre to me that parents are letting their kids go trick-or-treating.

On the other end of the spectrum, those who do not go trick-or-treating are spending ludicrous amounts of money to attend Halloween themed attractions year after year. I find real haunted places fascinating, but you couldn’t pay me enough to go to one.
When it comes down to it, I am easily scared, and I am jaded from my past experiences on Halloween. I am the Halloween Grinch. My goal with this article is not to suck the joy out of you who enjoy Halloween, but rather to show why I do not like it.

That being said, hope you had a happy Halloween.